Showtime
by datplushass
Summary: Aspiring actress Rukia Kuchiki hopes to be a star. A once almost-doctor Ichigo Kurosaki is now a drug addict who's broke and hopes for his next meal. Renji Abarai is an secret prostitute who charges steeply. When these three meet, all hell will run loose
1. Break a Leg

"Hold on now, let's not be too hasty-hey, what are you doing?" The 23-year-old man hollered as he tried to blockade the husky musclemen from lifting the furniture to his living room and out of the house, but they would merely run him down like bulldozers if the man didn't step out of the way.

"C'mon now, Shinji," The man pleaded, trying his best to stop the human hulks from loading his stuff into their truck. "Can't we work something out?"

The blonde slowly turned his head in that lingering, eerie way that made the man felt like icy, skeletal fingers were grabbing his throat. "We tried _working things_ _out_ before, but you never held up yer end of the deal, Ichigo. I gave ya plenty of chances, and ya had plenty of time to get the money, but as always, ya always bailed."

"A situation popped up-"

"Hmm, isn't it funny how on the _exact, _same day ya have to pay yer rent, there's always a "situation" that arises?"

"You trying to say something?" Ichigo glared daggers at his landlord, but they were futile, as the chocolate velvet cap the older man wore shielded his eyes.

"Now if ya don't mind, I'll be takin' yer shit to be sold on Ebay."

"Like hell you will!" He hissed as he pried an antique vase out of one of the repo men's hands and bared his teeth at him, making the man slowly exit. The man looked back at his proprietor, quickly shaking off his pent-up frustration in a second. "I'll have the money to you by Friday."

"Uh-huh, I've heard that one before."

"No, I'm serious this time!"

"Here's some advice," Shinji rolled his head to the panicking man, shooting him a jaded look. "If things ain't workin' out fer ya, maybe it's time fer ya to change what yer doin'."

"What are you talking about?" Ichigo scowled at the man sharply with his dark topaz eyes, getting the hint that his landlord was giving him a message within the message.

"You know very well what I'm talkin' about. The old people gots a saying—"Pleasure seekers have no leisure"."

"And just what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Think about it. It's some food fer thought. Well, I'd best be off and let the men finish their work," The blonde nodded as he tugged down on his cap, pulled down on his coat and dusted his shoulders as he made his way to the door. "Oh, and before I forget, I'll let ya stay one more night to get yer stuff together, but come midnight, yer ass better be outta here, understand? And you might wanna get rid of yer said "pleasure" before anything should…_happen _to it. I wouldn't even dare imagine if someone got their hands on it."

"Screw you," The sunset-haired male growled as he saw the movers move the last of everything out of the living room, but when they picked up the old dingy couch that his dad had given to him as a house-warming gift, he barked at them to stop. He then turned to Shinji. "At least let me have something to sleep on tonight."

The landlord was impassive for a moment, but he then ordered the two to drop the sofa and to leave. Looking at Ichigo, he said, "Man, things were so different five years ago. Hell, _you _were a lot different five years ago. You were a kid with dreams of becoming a doctor and now…look at you."

There was an awkward silence between the two with each of them averting the other's gaze. Shinji knew he was treading on thin ice, and he was very much aware of how unstable the ginger's temper could be. Especially when it came to touchy subjects like the past; but all he said was, "A lot of things happened in those five years. Things that change people."

"Yeah," The blonde cleared his throat as he walked over to Ichigo and placed something dry and papery in his hands. He glances confusedly for a second before looking at his palms, seeing a $500 bill in his hands. His auburn eyebrows knit together as his lips slightly parted, not understanding this sign, this bill, this gesture that his former friend had just given him.

"What's this?" Ichigo asked cautiously, but his eyes were that of a kid in Willy Wonka's factory.

"I can't letcha live without some kind of help. That should last ya a month if yer smart¸and get yer ass a job, you hear me?"

"Yes, mother," He mumbled as he held up the bill up to the light, only to have it snatched out of his hands from the very gifter himself. "Hey! You don't take back gifts!"

"It's my money, I'll do with it as I like. And bein' the capricious card that I am, you may have it one second, and then find it in my wallet the next."

"Bipolar freak," Ichigo groaned as he laid back on the raggedy couch and rolled on the other side so that his back was facing Shinji as he quickly situated himself for a quick snooze.

Letting out a subtle and almost silent chuckle, he bowed his head as he left, and he couldn't help but feel the tiniest pang inside of him as he took his first step out that doorway.

_Yer dog days are over, Ichigo._

* * *

><p><em> "And for the weather, we're having some clouds around the Shinjuku area 'til about noon, with a 95 percent chance of-"<em>

_ Click._

"Hmmm? A lazy voice from the bed mumbled in question as it heard the subtle shuffling of clothes and the clicks of heels against the hardwood floor. This awoke the male from his slumber, and as he cracked his eyes open, the first thing he saw was a female body covered by a mane of strawberry blonde sitting at the corner of his bed as she fumbled with the sleeves of her suede coat.

"Leaving so early?" The man queried as he sat up, letting out a lengthy yawn as he scratched his head. As eye was being rubbed open, the other was watching the female waste no time in trying to appear as if she didn't hook up with someone at the bar last night.

"Yeah, now if you'll excuse me," She mumbled as she straightened her coat and parted her hair evenly. "I'll be on my way."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" The man hollered, catching her attention as she jerked her head back into the room.

"What are you talking about?"

"We agreed last night that since you were in such a _dire _need of my services, I'd let you pay me in the morn when you were all straight and sober."

"I so don't remember that."

"Of course. You were drunk, smart one. But your taste in men hadn't dulled, even when you were intoxicated," He flashed her a grin, and there was a slight tinge of rosy embarrassment on the top of her cheeks.

"You psycho! You took advantage of me when I was drunk! I never needed your "services" or whatever!"

"And that's where you're wrong, my dear," The crimson-haired man laughed. "I could tell you were in a dry spell the moment you stepped foot into that bar."

"And that's totally not creepy," She sneered at him.

"Call it creepy, but it's what's paying my bills."

"So, you're a prostitute?"

"Oh, now that's too informal of a word. I'd like to think myself as a "handyman". You know, giving a hand, or a dick, when one needs it. I help people get that night of pleasure and everybody's all happy. But at a price of course."

"If you wanted my money, why not just steal it from me when I was drunk?"

"Unless you were too drunk to remember, I have a penis. Which means I'm a guy. Which means I won't deny sex from a hot chick. Basic sex math."

"So, you creep at bars, see whose desperate, and then take advantage of them?" The woman laughed out loud.

"You make me seem as if I have absolutely no kind of life."

"Well, that's what you do! You're basically an undercover guy hooker."

"All that and much more, Cher."

"So, what'll it take you to get you outta my hair? How much?" She asked as she dug in her snakeskin wallet.

"Hmmm…if I can recall our appointment," The guy rubbed his chin in a mock fashion, as if he was in some kind of stupor. "It's on the house."

"Oh?"

"Because for once, it didn't actually feel like "work". For the other women, lemme tell you, it's just-"

"Okay, I didn't ask for your sex life!" She squealed.

"But all matters aside, it was great. You did a good job, if I do say so myself."

"Uh, yeah, you too," The blonde tucked the stray bangs behind her ears while trying to shy her reddened face away from the man as she exited the room once more.

You forgot something," The man chimed again, although this time, her patience had started to melt away.

"What is it _this _time?" She glared, her Arctic eyes shooting him daggers of icy impatience.

"Your name," He blinked, seeing how off-guard she was by this question.

"Oh. Well, a name's just a name. There's seven billion out there. We won't stumble into each other again. Wouldn't it be better if we _didn't _know each other's names?"

"What's the problem? We live in a city with over two million people. I doubt we'll see each other again. So before you say anything," He said as he got out of the bed and extended a hand. "Renji Abarai. And you?"

She stared down at his _south _for a moment with a slightly opened mouth before looking up, slowly shaking his hand. "Rangiku Matsumoto…now I really do have to get going. Thanks for the free sex," She nodded as she left, swiftly shutting the apartment door behind her.

Renji couldn't help but laugh to himself at the encounter he just had. Laying back on his mattress, staring at the TV across from him, and then the window covered with raindrops that clung onto the net the tiny liquid jewels that held an upside-down world within them.

"Huh," He uttered to himself, sitting up on the bed, amused with how the day was going so far. "That's a girl I won't forget anytime soon."

* * *

><p>"C'mon! Let's go, go, go! We have to <em>go! <em>We have to be down at the Hilton in 30 for the red carpet premiere and if you're not there by the time that tiny hand reaches 10-"

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" A petite woman ran out of the dressing room, all while nearly tripping on the silver heels she had yet to put on. "I had to wrestle one of those skinny whores for the last piece of food, which explains why my shoes are messed up. Sorry."

Voluminous ebony curls bounced as she hopped on one foot as an anxious manager/assisstant bent down and fixed her shoes.

"Rukia, you can eat on the way there. We're wasting time already!"

"Ishida, you have not _lived _until you've had this!" The woman stuffed her anxious friend's mouth with food. "It's called a Lercaise Flambe. You gotta love French food."

After chewing and hastily swallowing the mass down, the skinny man said, "We've no time for sampling! This is your first red carpet appearance! We _have _to go!"

"We'll just arrive fashionably late then," She smiled, with her assistant leading the way to the limo all while bumping up his rectangular frames with his middle finger like he always did and fetching out his Blackberry to stop the incessant buzzing in his pocket.

The woman next to him was the complete inverse. If you asked her how excited she was, you might think she'd have a disorder from her anticipation. However, she did know that first impressions were everything, and that even the littlest of words could completely ruin her career as an actress. The debut of appearance on television was the event that made people stop and stare and say, 'Hey, I've seen her somewhere!'. And this red carpet premiere was just the party for her to mingle.

While getting into the limo, the two were awfully quiet, both mentally preparing themselves in their own ways. As Ishida was tying up phone calls and conferencing people from miles away, Rukia let her imagination stray free on how glamorous and perfect this event would go. It's one tiny notch up the ladder to her becoming more and more famous and therefore becoming a more notorious actress. She did that often, daydream. It's how she drew out her eccentricity, which is how she got started as an actress. Although her life was sometimes lonely, she could never complain that it wasn't bustling. Ever since she debuted on the show '_Two and a Half Reigai', _people have started recognizing her in the street. It eventually came to the point where she could no longer walk in the street for the fear of paparazzi ambushing her.

That, of course, was six months ago. She had planted her heels in the business, and she was going to keep on going until she had achieved the fame she wanted. And this red carpet event was just the event for that.

"We're here," Ishida muttered while putting up his phone. "You ready?"

"Not at all. But then again, it's good to have some anxiety in your system. Give you that edge of spontaneity."

"Just don't be too spontaneous, alright?" He stared at her, waiting for an answer.

Rukia Kuchiki thought this night would be it. The one in which she would spread her wings. The one in which she'd get a call from a late-night show to be their guest.

And boy, was this a night to remember.

* * *

><p>AN: Howdy y'all. I'm back from the dead. And with a new story to top it all off! Short, but I wanted to publish the other chapters before starting this one(: And I've an upcoming (yaoi) one-shot coming up, so stay tuned (it's for a friend, but still a one-yaoi-shot nonetheless). And although this one is rather "milder" than the others, this will definitely be one that will keep y'all on your toes. Read, review, reread, and re-love, lol. Much love~


	2. (Not a chapter, but important news!)

For convenience purposes, I am relocating this story to my new Fanfiction account, as posted on my profile. I am so sorry if this is bothersome, but I plan on closing this account so I can revise my writings. This story will have a whole new _redux _to it, while sticking to the same plot line. **Several things to come are:** shorter chapters; cleaner and precise writing (now that I've gained more experience); frequent updates; references to the current arcs in the manga (new characters included); and better response time. I will be deleting this story one week from now, but for now, please bare with the clean up. I promise the story will be so much smoother with the revision.

Much thanks,

-S


	3. Update & How to get to the new Showtime

_Showtime _is finally updated ! However, it's on my new account, and is now titled « _(End)less Rigma(Role)_ ». I cannot post links because of FFN's format, so here's how to read the new story!

Google "skullwings fanfiction"

Click on the first link (It should be a FFN profile link)

You're on my new account page. Scroll down to "(End)less Rigma(role)" {the updated _Showtime}_

You're at the new story! Enjoy reading!


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